Friday, June 4, 2010

Wrong way

Weighed in at 148.4, and things just seem to be going the wrong way. True I am aiming for maintenance, but every week Ive gained around .2 or .4 and it is really driving me crazy as to why. True, I did eat more than I normally would on Monday since I attended a party. I ate mostly healthy, but I did have a beer and a cookie for dessert. Still, I would hardly think that 4 days later I would still be holding on to any of that.

Ive still been tracking my food in spark people and that is right on. Ive still been averaging 4-5 days a week for workouts. The only difference the last few weeks is that I have been able to work from home on Fridays which means i have worked out in the morning. I would think a work out prior to a weigh in would lead to a loss, but that is seriously the only differnece in my habits since I started seeing the small increase in my weight. Maybe I am just paranoid and Ive had a bad few weeks. TOM is coming soon and I tend to bloat from that, but since I hit my low of 147.8 2 weeks ago, its been 2 weeks of small gains. Its been around 148 for a month now.

It sucks that I have to live my life paranoid of gaining back weight. I am really happy where I am at now. Yet I am so afraid of gaining it back and now I see these small gains and it makes me feel crazy. Especially when the next few weeks are filled with parties, my birthday, a White Sox game, etc. where Im eating out a lot. I am so afraid I will be over 150 again and I have spent months since xmas getting to this point only to fear its going to be undone.

That is just my freak out moment right there. I know I have control over things and that I always do the best that I can. Its hard when I reach moments like this where I am doing everything I can and its not enough, and then it gets even harder when I reach moments where I dont have enough control and then I am afraid of what things will really be like. I just need to keep doing all that I can and hope that I start to see a change.

4 comments:

Genie @ Diet of 51 said...

To me, it sounds like you're doing really well. BRAVO! Maintenance is harder than losing, I think.

Trisaratops said...

I'm glad you said it is just a little freak out moment - because you're really doing well. Do you weigh every day? I do, and it helped me see the fluctuations that my body goes through every day. When I only weighed once a week, and saw a small gain, or a larger one than .4, I would be upset. But seeing it be there one day, and gone the next, made me realize that my body is rarely the same weight 2 days in a row. It helped me. You are so vigilant, you're never going to be overweight again, I know it! You might crest over 150 once in a while due to stress or a busy week, but trust me, you have maintained your loss for so long, that I think you won't ever be overweight. You've created new habits. I hope you enjoy your parties and events in the next few weeks!

Teale said...

The thing about maintenance is that it's nearly impossible to stay practically the same weight non-stop! There are going to be those fluctuations of a few pounds up or down, but the overall trend is continued maintenance. There's going to be those tough weeks when we have extra food-related activities, but it's overall how we do that matters! Keep up the great work!

Lyn said...

Hey Heather!

I understand the freaking out and the fear of regain. I wish I had an answer but you're far ahead of me in the weight loss game. You are doing really great at keeping your weight fairly steady though.

I read about the 'shower' too and omg, I feel bad for you. I am glad the new family will be doing something special. You totally deserve it. HUGS!