Monday, April 21, 2008

Interesting day

Well I weighed in only .2 more than Friday, and I am still down a pound from where I was last week. So overall, not too bad for a weekend of no exercise and some poor food choices. Today I was exhausted by the end of the work day and it was so busy, but I managed to come home and get some exercise in. At least now I can claim some exercise for the past week.

Today was a day full of interesting comments at my work. Some were good, like the graphic designer telling me that I "looked really good", and a data entry person saying that I was "shrinking away". Others were more interesting, like:

"Do you ever just cheat on your diet and eat everything you want to?": This comment I received at about 7:30 this morning from the strange accountant we have. He always makes comments about my weight loss, but this one kind of irritated me (probably was partly due to the time). I replied that I dont because I dont consider this a diet, its how I choose to eat for the rest of my life, and I eat the things that I like every day. He just kind of looked at me for a minute and then walked away. Completely inappropriate! Im glad I was able to stick up for myself and the way I choose the live my life.

"Did your boyfriend ever tell you that you were getting fat?": I was almost stunned speechless by this comment. First, I couldnt believe that anyone's significant other would say something so hurtful, but then it spun into a debate that another employee started because he felt that it was the responsibility of someone in a relationship to make sure the person they are with is healthy. It was quite interesting, but it made me uncomfortable. Sure, when I met my boyfriend, I was thin and over the years we have been together, gained weight. It wasnt overnight, it was slowly and all the sudden it was like, Im fat! Obviously he was aware that my body changed, but he never said anything. its not as if I was unaware myself, and its not as if at that point, it mattered to him. Sure, sometimes I wonder if he met me at my highest weight, would he have been attracted to me? Would he have wanted to start a relationship with me? Who knows. Maybe he would have, maybe not. First impressions are everything (even when inaccurate), so its hard to say if he would have wanted to be with me then. All I know is, never once did he make me feel fat or disgusting. Never once did he indicate that he wished I would lose weight. I have had friends whose boyfriends and husbands have made comments about their weight, but never my boyfriend. He always told me I was beautiful. Sure, he saw the fat, but Im sure he saw the person behind the fat and that was more important to him. I dont really think its his responsibility to make me "aware" that I was fat. He did encourage me to do physical things like ride bikes or join a gym. He always supported my efforts to lose weight. That to me is much better than saying "you are fat, lose weight!".

So overall, interesting day. Amusing that one's weight can become the topic that people debate on and feel the need to comment about.

11 comments:

Cammy said...

Just as people can be incredibly supportive, they can also be amazingly rude. Someone asked *in a meeting* the other day if I'd lost about 100 lbs. I couldn't believe it! I could feel my face burning, but I managed to reply that I hadn't lost anywhere close to that but that I'd be proud if I had.

Fortunately that was followed by one co-worker telling me that someone we hadn't seen in a while asked him if I'd lost weight "on purpose." She didn't want to bring it up if I was ill. Awww, so thoughtful. More than canceled out Rude Meeting Woman.

Hope you and BF feel better soon!

40 by 40 said...

Poor dear! Mono! I had that in high school and it knocked my on my a&* for a while! You ok? Open the windows and disinfect your place..It's been so nice out..fresh air would be a good thing. I hope you both feel better. Your BF sounds like a wonderful person. Good for him for being cool with you however you look. Love that. I am lucky to have it too.
Also, what a great feeling for you that your summer clothes are TOOOOO big!!! YAY HEATHER!! Feel good...take it easy until you are feeling better.

MB said...

I can't believe some of the stupid things that come out of people's mouths. I'm glad you were able to stick up for yourself.

I am always super sensitive whenever my boyfriend says anything about my weight. I know he is just trying to help and he is not being mean but it always gets turned around in my head and I get very defensive with him.

I hope you are feeling better.

Merry said...

I like the sound of your boyfriend! And I feel sorry for the women whose boyfriends/husbands give them criticism over their weight.
Love them for themselves, and help them to be healthy, yes. Criticize their appearance, no.

Hanlie said...

Your boyfriend sounds like a great guy! Sorry you're both ill.

People can be difficult to handle and this is such a touchy subject that most people get it wrong anyway. As long as you know that you're doing the best for yourself, that's all that matters!

Erin said...

Your boyfriend sounds like a keeper...does he have a brother??? Who's single??? LOL I hope both of you get feeling better, and I like to think when people ask questions it's because they are jealous!!!

Manuela said...

I'm glad the scale was good to you!

I'm sorry about your boyfriend and yourself getting sick. Some viruses like that do like to make a comeback.

I hope that you're both feeling better :)

On the people front I'll just quote Seinfeld once again "People, they're the worst!" (thank goodness we both know that's only true of a few)

HappyBlogChick said...

Huh, it is interesting that there was so much talk about your weight, and some very odd conversations!


Congrats on being down a pound from last week. :-)

Jess said...

I've often found that people's comments on others' exercise and nutrition habits mostly reflect their own attitudes about it. So, those who offer encouraging comments are admiring what you've done and hope perhaps that they can do the same. Those who offer negative or passive-aggressive comments are often jealous of what you're doing and they are miffed that they are envious of you and your accomplishments.

I encounter it with running all the time. Some people say wonderful things, and other times I hear "Running is bad for you; you'll hurt your knees" or "Marathoners are crazy."

I figure, hey, that's their issue, not mine.

Crystal said...

Wow, you have some outspoken people at your office. I was quite surprised that someone would say stuff like that! I think it's great that you have such a supportive boyfriend who looks out for you in positive ways and loves and appreciates you for who you are. Sounds like a keeper!

Trisaratops said...

First - hooray on not fitting into last year's clothes - a fab feeling! Second - oh my - Mono! Yikes - that's awful. I hope you're on the mend soon. I love the peanut gallery at work. Why do people want to hear about cheating most of all? Sometimes I think they want to reassure themselves that everyone falters sometimes, or that its hard every day.

My husband never ever comments on my weight. I would be appalled if he ever did. I know a woman who is 50 years old, a size 4, and at 50 years old, and 2 kids, has gained 9pounds over the course of a year, and her husband told her to lose it. He warned her when they got married that if she gained weight, he'd leave her. I can't believe they ever made it down the aisle. Thank goodness for supportive men like ours.